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Ashley - Health Educator Feb 14, 2018 (08:29 PM)  

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Hi Agua,

I think you have a lot of great insight into what is going on when you freeze up.  Many people have lots of trouble during high conflict situations or even just expressing themselves in general. You are certainly not alone in that. Secondly, I think everyone needs to work on how they address rude or passive aggressive people. Rude or passive aggressive people are tough to deal with and would stress anyone out.  You can work on this with exposure, core beliefs work and lots of practice. You may also want to look up assertive behaviours as being assertive is a skill that requires lots of practice and knowledge. 

So, to get started. Have you been able to pin point the exact core belief(s) that may be fuelling this?  Labelling the core belief is often the toughest part.

Also, what do you think an exposure plan could look like? This may be tricky as you can't really plan when someone is going to be rude with you. You may have to be quite creative. 

If any members have any thoughts or suggestions please share.

Hope to read more from you soon,

Ashley, Health Educator

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agua Feb 06, 2018 (02:12 PM)  

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Joined: Aug 06, 2014

When people are rude or passive agressive to me with no reason, I become freeze and cannot interact. There are times I need to defend myself but I find most of the time I have no answer, I can not connect to myself and articulate any thought. Its like a poison that sticks on my head, and I become so sad with me because of that. This is important because if we dont make our point, passive agressive behaviours tend to escalate, and it is very stressfull.

I think this could be a core belief, around 12 years I remember developing the ideia that I can not say this or that, because it may hurt this person feelings. I become extremely sensitive to others feelings, but in a way that it was too severe on myself.
Don´t know how to change that, this become my default behaviour, and are not funcional.

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